What do girls need to succeed? To feel confident, capable and whole. For starters, they need to learn how to feel comfortable in their own skin, to develop the inner strength to deal with the demands of peers, school and society and to love themselves just the way they are. But it's difficult. Because girls receive so many conflicting messages that it's difficult to distinguish between what really matters and what's media fed hype.On one hand girls are told, "You can do and be anything if you believe in yourself and follow your dreams." On the other hand they are given the message that the ideal girls is one who behaves like a sex object or acts so composed and masculine that she scares off anyone who crosses her path. If girls are made to feel like they do not have any real value beyond their looks or that they have to fit the media's cookie-cutter image of a "real girl," or they have to act like men to be taken seriously; then they will grow up confused and insecure. The good news is as a mother and woman with life experience under your belt, you already know a lot about what it takes to help girls become strong and secure. Here are seven tips to help your daughter build confidence.
1. Help Her To Believe In Herself
If girls believe in themselves and have a healthy sense of identity, they will be able to assert their needs and see themselves as capable and lovable individuals. Show your daughter that you her and enjoy her company. Give her special tasks that enable her to feel significant, noticed and successful.
2. Value Her Uniqueness
Every girl needs to be accepted for who she is. This builds her confidence and her ability to stand her ground when pressured to stray away from her values. Let your daughter know what you admire about her. Encourage her to pursue her own unique interests. Make a conscious effort to understand her, even if you don't agree with her. Teach her how to speak up for herself, even if others disagree with her point of view.
3. Help Her Feel Like She Belongs
Girls have a profound need to be accepted, to be part of a social circle that she fits in with. When she fits in socially, it meets her need for a social identity and helps her not to feel like an outcast. Help her meet her need to belong in a positive way by including her in family decisions. Get her input about decisions that will impact her. Help her to find social clubs, community groups and extra-curricular activities that allow her to nurture her interests and expand her social world. Be on the look out for signs of loneliness and social isolation.
4. Acknowledge Her Feelings
Feelings are fundamental. They help us make sense of the world. The sooner a girl learns that it's OK to express her feelings, the better able she will be to communicate with others and stand up for herself. Acknowledge your daughter's feelings and give her feelings validity. Share in her joys and struggles. Help her to put a bad day into perspective and not obsess over what other people think. Help her to trust her intuition.
5. Understand Her Social World
The social world of girls presents many opportunities and challenges. Ask her about her friends and interests. Teach her how to handle emotional bullying, sarcasm and the other kinds of subtle and not so subtle behaviors that girls often engage in to exert their influence, boost their status within the peer group and socially intimidate other girls. But also explain to her that there are many girls who do not engage in this kind of behavior and the best rule of thumb to live by is: Treat others as you would like to be treated.
6. Deal Sensitively With Peer Pressure
Throughout history girls have been faced with the pressure to confirm. But nowadays this pressure is happening at a younger and younger age. Help your daughter to feel accepted as she is. Discuss the issue of peer pressure and the dangers of engaging in behaviors that go against your values or lead to negative outcomes. Try not to be overly critical of her. This only makes her want to be more rebellious.
7. Be Realistic In Your Expectations
Every mother has her own set of expectations for her children. However, it's important that your expectations are age and ability appropriate and not so rigid and unrealistic that your daughter feels like nothing she does will ever be good enough for you. If she feels like she can never measure up, she may stop trying all together. Encourage her to put her best foot forward, but give her room to be human.
Rabu, 13 September 2017
Minggu, 27 Agustus 2017
Funky Maternity Clothes - You Can Still Dress In Your Unique Style When You Are Expecting
There was a time when being pregnant meant sacrificing your personal style for nine whole months. And when you surrender your fashion sense you can really lose a part of yourself. Don't get lost in boring smocked shirts and stretch pants while you wait for your little one to arrive, be yourself in funky maternity clothes. You don't have to lose who you are in motherhood when you maintain your funky fresh style all along the way.
Funky maternity clothes give you lots of options. Finding shirts to fit your growing baby bump doesn't have to be a chore. Many stores these days are offering a wide selection of maternity shirts that are fun and hip. You can choose anything from shirts with political sayings and eco-friendly messages to art from well-known and obscure artists. The choices are endless!
Maternity pants used to be one of the main things that women dreaded about pregnancy. But stretch pants, jeans and slacks that don't fit right, and over-sized dresses are a thing of the past. Today, funky maternity clothing includes cute jeans, fun skirts with unique and interesting prints, and dresses that are exciting, flattering and versatile. And with the styles of today being so adaptable and universal, you can mix and match your pieces to make the most of your maternity wardrobe.
You may have never thought about making your own clothing, or perhaps you do it all the time. Either way, DIY is a great way to have funky maternity clothes that fit your style and your body perfectly. Basic maternity t-shirts are widely available in almost any color and style. But if they are just too boring for you, you might consider customizing one or several with embroidery, fabric paints or even tie-dye. Or have some basic T's professionally screen printed for something put together and unique at the same time.
DIY works for pants too. If you're having trouble finding maternity pants that you like, you might try converting a pair of fun and unique pants you already own to work for your pregnancy. Or shop non-maternity items and look for skirts and dresses with empire waists and plenty of extra room, then add a little bit of flair on your own. When you create or embellish your own funky maternity clothes, you end up with something that is truly unique!
Funky maternity clothes give you lots of options. Finding shirts to fit your growing baby bump doesn't have to be a chore. Many stores these days are offering a wide selection of maternity shirts that are fun and hip. You can choose anything from shirts with political sayings and eco-friendly messages to art from well-known and obscure artists. The choices are endless!
Maternity pants used to be one of the main things that women dreaded about pregnancy. But stretch pants, jeans and slacks that don't fit right, and over-sized dresses are a thing of the past. Today, funky maternity clothing includes cute jeans, fun skirts with unique and interesting prints, and dresses that are exciting, flattering and versatile. And with the styles of today being so adaptable and universal, you can mix and match your pieces to make the most of your maternity wardrobe.
You may have never thought about making your own clothing, or perhaps you do it all the time. Either way, DIY is a great way to have funky maternity clothes that fit your style and your body perfectly. Basic maternity t-shirts are widely available in almost any color and style. But if they are just too boring for you, you might consider customizing one or several with embroidery, fabric paints or even tie-dye. Or have some basic T's professionally screen printed for something put together and unique at the same time.
DIY works for pants too. If you're having trouble finding maternity pants that you like, you might try converting a pair of fun and unique pants you already own to work for your pregnancy. Or shop non-maternity items and look for skirts and dresses with empire waists and plenty of extra room, then add a little bit of flair on your own. When you create or embellish your own funky maternity clothes, you end up with something that is truly unique!
Minggu, 13 Agustus 2017
The Perfect Trap - Why the Perfect Home Isn't Perfect, It's Comfortable!
Martha Stewart can go for a walk in the woods and find inspiration in pinecones. She would collect them, spray paint them, stick white parchment with guests' names in golden calligraphy on them, and bravo, have brand new place settings. Had you or I been in the woods, we would have been too busy listening to the birds to notice the hidden potential in pines. That's our problem, you see. We're too busy living to be good housekeepers.
But that doesn't stop us from feeling guilty that our homes are chaotic. We huddle indoors, afraid to let anybody in for fear they may notice how we actually live. We may meet a neighbour, and want to invite her in for coffee, only to realize to our horror that our breakfast dishes are still in the sink. Instead, we retreat inside again where we can turn on the gardening channel and feel a whole new level of guilt because our homes don't measure up.
Don't get me wrong. I love having a neat home. I even like some of Martha's crafts. But we can go way overboard on this need to have perfect homes. We forget what homes are really about.
Relationships Matter More than Housework
In the end, relationships matter. Dust bunnies don't. That doesn't mean we shouldn't clean; simply that when we do our aim is to create a comfortable home where everybody will want to be, not a perfect home where we get nervous if the kids play. My grandmother used to lament the fact that she couldn't keep her home perfect like some of her neighbours. But one day she woke up to the reason. She always had children over. She had toys. She had books. She had magazines. Her friends had collections of floor polish.
A Home Is Made of Real People
Yet which was more of a home? The one where you could see your reflection on the floor, or the one where you could see your child's latest Lego creation? A home will contain toys, books, crafts, and hobbies, all of which are evidence of the personalities who live there. There's nothing wrong with that. After all, we invite people over to get to know us anyway. Everybody's more comfortable in a house that reflects you than in an antiseptically clean house straight out of Better Homes and Gardens.
Sometimes we forget this lesson. Think about what your children heard you say today. Many days at my house, it's things like "what are your toys doing on the stairs?" "Get your stuff out of the living room! Do you expect me to always clean it up?". "Why can't you ever pick anything up?". Add all this up, and the message is clear: "you kids are a hassle. Shape up!"
Finding a Comfortable Medium
I want our house to be comfortable. That means my kids must be allowed to play. It also needs to be comfortable for me, though, so they can't play where I want to knit. And they do have to keep their piles to a minimum so we can all walk without breaking our necks. A comfortable home also means being able to shower without fear of contracting some disease. Cleanliness and basic clutter control are both certainly necessary. Perfection, though, is not.
Sometimes I forget these lessons and the yelling begins again. But housework does not make a home. People do. My house will never be perfect, but I hope it's one that my children will one day look back on fondly. Especially because I don't have any floor polish.
But that doesn't stop us from feeling guilty that our homes are chaotic. We huddle indoors, afraid to let anybody in for fear they may notice how we actually live. We may meet a neighbour, and want to invite her in for coffee, only to realize to our horror that our breakfast dishes are still in the sink. Instead, we retreat inside again where we can turn on the gardening channel and feel a whole new level of guilt because our homes don't measure up.
Don't get me wrong. I love having a neat home. I even like some of Martha's crafts. But we can go way overboard on this need to have perfect homes. We forget what homes are really about.
Relationships Matter More than Housework
In the end, relationships matter. Dust bunnies don't. That doesn't mean we shouldn't clean; simply that when we do our aim is to create a comfortable home where everybody will want to be, not a perfect home where we get nervous if the kids play. My grandmother used to lament the fact that she couldn't keep her home perfect like some of her neighbours. But one day she woke up to the reason. She always had children over. She had toys. She had books. She had magazines. Her friends had collections of floor polish.
A Home Is Made of Real People
Yet which was more of a home? The one where you could see your reflection on the floor, or the one where you could see your child's latest Lego creation? A home will contain toys, books, crafts, and hobbies, all of which are evidence of the personalities who live there. There's nothing wrong with that. After all, we invite people over to get to know us anyway. Everybody's more comfortable in a house that reflects you than in an antiseptically clean house straight out of Better Homes and Gardens.
Sometimes we forget this lesson. Think about what your children heard you say today. Many days at my house, it's things like "what are your toys doing on the stairs?" "Get your stuff out of the living room! Do you expect me to always clean it up?". "Why can't you ever pick anything up?". Add all this up, and the message is clear: "you kids are a hassle. Shape up!"
Finding a Comfortable Medium
I want our house to be comfortable. That means my kids must be allowed to play. It also needs to be comfortable for me, though, so they can't play where I want to knit. And they do have to keep their piles to a minimum so we can all walk without breaking our necks. A comfortable home also means being able to shower without fear of contracting some disease. Cleanliness and basic clutter control are both certainly necessary. Perfection, though, is not.
Sometimes I forget these lessons and the yelling begins again. But housework does not make a home. People do. My house will never be perfect, but I hope it's one that my children will one day look back on fondly. Especially because I don't have any floor polish.
Jumat, 28 Juli 2017
Your Fire Prevention Plan That Your Family May Only Need Once
So the cooler weather is upon us and out come the heaters, candles and cooking appliances ... but wait, have you taken the necessary fire precautions to protect your family?
I just moved out of a home that had a third floor and my gift to the new owners were portable step ladders for their two daughters who will be sleeping on that level. Oh sure, I could have left a gift basket of chocolate and cookies that they could eat right away but I decided to give them something that hopefully they will never have to use. With this in mind, I thought I would write about fire prevention for you and your family. Pass it around and share it and hopefully they too will never have to use their emergency resources when a fire decides to rear it's ugly head.
"It could never happen to me"... that's what I thought when I was alone in my home with my newborn baby in an isolated area on the lake up north. There was a terrible storm outside and my husband was in the city. I always liked to look out the window and watch the raindrops and wind dance and glide along the surface of the water. I'll never forget the thunderous "boom" as all the lights turned on in the home, the garage door went up and the smell of smoke started to permeate my surroundings. Outside the storm was still raging. Lightning bolts were all around and darkness had encircled my once safe abode. I knew I had to get out. I carefully wrapped my child in a blanket and start knocking on nearby doors. Terrified I ran in fear as the lightning and thunder surrounded me. By the fifth house I was able to find someone who was home and could call the fire department. Most of our electrical possessions were destroyed. Two bolts of lightening had hit the home at the same time and the damage blew through most of the electrical panel. The most important thing was that my baby and I were safe. This is just my example of an escape from fire, but what are other ways to protect and prevent a fire in your home. We can't always protect from mother nature but here is a list of a dozen ways you can protect yourself and your family.
#1. Have a 3 minute fire drill in your home for your family or home office staff. Make sure they know to crawl low under the smoke and have portable stepladders ready for the upper floors
#2. Throw out the old slow cooker or coffee maker that you've had for decades. Any appliance with at tattered cord or no ground on the plug should be retired
#3. Don't overload extension cords., Get the electrician in to add more outlets or add a new breaker to your electrical panel
#4. Have auto shut off appliances for your coffee maker, curling iron, clothes iron etc...
#5. Change your smoke detectors every 10 years and their batteries every year (I do it at Christmas, as part of my gifts for my family... I'm usually buying batteries anyway) While we're at it, also make sure you have a carbon monoxide detector and change those batteries as well
#6. Never leave a dryer or dishwasher on and go to bed or leave the house. Any fire respondent will tell you that many fires start in these two appliances.
#7. If you have old knob and tube wiring or are always blowing fuses or breakers, time to call the electrician. These old fashioned electrical methods were not made for our super energy fridges, stoves and other energy zapping appliances
#8. Never leave your old paints, rags, turpentine or other combustibles inside your home.
#9. I just threw out my old fire extinguishers in the move. They were old and past their prime... getting new ones for every level of my home today.
#10. Smoke outside... period
#11. Cook carefully. No robes with dangling sleeves for making breakfast and never leave any meal with oil or bacon unattended
#12. Buy the battery operated candles for those romantic evenings or just keep an eye on the real candles. I once saw a whole coffee table go up in flames because a bunch of tea candles decided to melt through their aluminum frames.
Lastly, pass the list on to someone you love..it could save their life
Have a happy and healthy season folks,
I just moved out of a home that had a third floor and my gift to the new owners were portable step ladders for their two daughters who will be sleeping on that level. Oh sure, I could have left a gift basket of chocolate and cookies that they could eat right away but I decided to give them something that hopefully they will never have to use. With this in mind, I thought I would write about fire prevention for you and your family. Pass it around and share it and hopefully they too will never have to use their emergency resources when a fire decides to rear it's ugly head.
"It could never happen to me"... that's what I thought when I was alone in my home with my newborn baby in an isolated area on the lake up north. There was a terrible storm outside and my husband was in the city. I always liked to look out the window and watch the raindrops and wind dance and glide along the surface of the water. I'll never forget the thunderous "boom" as all the lights turned on in the home, the garage door went up and the smell of smoke started to permeate my surroundings. Outside the storm was still raging. Lightning bolts were all around and darkness had encircled my once safe abode. I knew I had to get out. I carefully wrapped my child in a blanket and start knocking on nearby doors. Terrified I ran in fear as the lightning and thunder surrounded me. By the fifth house I was able to find someone who was home and could call the fire department. Most of our electrical possessions were destroyed. Two bolts of lightening had hit the home at the same time and the damage blew through most of the electrical panel. The most important thing was that my baby and I were safe. This is just my example of an escape from fire, but what are other ways to protect and prevent a fire in your home. We can't always protect from mother nature but here is a list of a dozen ways you can protect yourself and your family.
#1. Have a 3 minute fire drill in your home for your family or home office staff. Make sure they know to crawl low under the smoke and have portable stepladders ready for the upper floors
#2. Throw out the old slow cooker or coffee maker that you've had for decades. Any appliance with at tattered cord or no ground on the plug should be retired
#3. Don't overload extension cords., Get the electrician in to add more outlets or add a new breaker to your electrical panel
#4. Have auto shut off appliances for your coffee maker, curling iron, clothes iron etc...
#5. Change your smoke detectors every 10 years and their batteries every year (I do it at Christmas, as part of my gifts for my family... I'm usually buying batteries anyway) While we're at it, also make sure you have a carbon monoxide detector and change those batteries as well
#6. Never leave a dryer or dishwasher on and go to bed or leave the house. Any fire respondent will tell you that many fires start in these two appliances.
#7. If you have old knob and tube wiring or are always blowing fuses or breakers, time to call the electrician. These old fashioned electrical methods were not made for our super energy fridges, stoves and other energy zapping appliances
#8. Never leave your old paints, rags, turpentine or other combustibles inside your home.
#9. I just threw out my old fire extinguishers in the move. They were old and past their prime... getting new ones for every level of my home today.
#10. Smoke outside... period
#11. Cook carefully. No robes with dangling sleeves for making breakfast and never leave any meal with oil or bacon unattended
#12. Buy the battery operated candles for those romantic evenings or just keep an eye on the real candles. I once saw a whole coffee table go up in flames because a bunch of tea candles decided to melt through their aluminum frames.
Lastly, pass the list on to someone you love..it could save their life
Have a happy and healthy season folks,
Jumat, 14 Juli 2017
Singles Dating - How to Find Your Perfect Mate?
Finding your perfect match when you begin dating can be tedious and downright frustrating after you hit many walls on your pathway to meeting the perfect one for you. However, it doesn't have to be a process that seems like work. You should enjoy the journey to finding someone that you can consider spending the rest of your life with.
First, know what you are looking for in a match. Don't be willing to bend on some issues that you vehemently oppose. For example, if you cannot stand someone who smokes don't compromise on the issue just because you feel like you're never going to find someone that meets your requirements. There are millions of people out there which means you are bound to find someone who thinks the same way you do. A relationship is somewhere that you don't need to cut corners on.
Second, know what your mate should be looking for when they see you. Don't allow yourself to pretend to be someone that you aren't. You are an individual with your own goals, needs, desires, and wants in life. If you aren't going to be able to live with someone who has children for example, don't take a risk by getting involved with someone who has kids thinking that you will learn to be happy. You should treat yourself as the number one goal and the focus should always be on making yourself happy as well as making them happy too. Don't modify your appearance drastically just to appeal to someone. If you do make any changes, make them for yourself first and foremost.
Mistakes are a learning experience that you will evidently make as you begin dating. The first person that you go on a date with probably won't be the one you enter a long term relationship with and that is perfectly okay. Don't feel like you need to be serious too quickly because there is plenty of time for you to find someone who will be a match. If something goes wrong in your dating experiences, don't give up. Everything isn't going to be perfect and you are bound to hit some hurdles in the process but pick yourself back up and try again to date. It will be worth it completely once you learn from the past and apply those lessons to the future.
Learn from your past relationships. This can take some time and often the realizations you make will hurt or take some time to sink in but that is perfectly acceptable. If you discover what you did wrong to make your previous relationships fail you can keep these in mind with future partners and avoid doing them again. It's not all on your shoulders though. Take note of what they did to cause the relationship to fall apart and know what some warning signs are so that you don't experience these faults in another relationship. History does not have to repeat itself in your relationship path as long as you don't let it.
First, know what you are looking for in a match. Don't be willing to bend on some issues that you vehemently oppose. For example, if you cannot stand someone who smokes don't compromise on the issue just because you feel like you're never going to find someone that meets your requirements. There are millions of people out there which means you are bound to find someone who thinks the same way you do. A relationship is somewhere that you don't need to cut corners on.
Second, know what your mate should be looking for when they see you. Don't allow yourself to pretend to be someone that you aren't. You are an individual with your own goals, needs, desires, and wants in life. If you aren't going to be able to live with someone who has children for example, don't take a risk by getting involved with someone who has kids thinking that you will learn to be happy. You should treat yourself as the number one goal and the focus should always be on making yourself happy as well as making them happy too. Don't modify your appearance drastically just to appeal to someone. If you do make any changes, make them for yourself first and foremost.
Mistakes are a learning experience that you will evidently make as you begin dating. The first person that you go on a date with probably won't be the one you enter a long term relationship with and that is perfectly okay. Don't feel like you need to be serious too quickly because there is plenty of time for you to find someone who will be a match. If something goes wrong in your dating experiences, don't give up. Everything isn't going to be perfect and you are bound to hit some hurdles in the process but pick yourself back up and try again to date. It will be worth it completely once you learn from the past and apply those lessons to the future.
Learn from your past relationships. This can take some time and often the realizations you make will hurt or take some time to sink in but that is perfectly acceptable. If you discover what you did wrong to make your previous relationships fail you can keep these in mind with future partners and avoid doing them again. It's not all on your shoulders though. Take note of what they did to cause the relationship to fall apart and know what some warning signs are so that you don't experience these faults in another relationship. History does not have to repeat itself in your relationship path as long as you don't let it.
Selasa, 27 Juni 2017
Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep - Just Watch Me Make My Mommy Weep
They call me Junior, tell me I'm two, and, according to my bib, consider me a precious little gift from heaven, which may no longer apply after the seven-hour car ride today where I threw three temper tantrums, stuck a jelly bean up my nose, choked on a plastic frog, and timed each poopy to occur after we passed the rest stop.
We were at the beach, judging by the smell of battered fish and overabundance of joggers wearing thongs. It was another family reunion with Mommy's family who, according to Daddy, doesn't have a brain cell or a complete set of teeth between them - crammed into what was advertised as a quaint water-front cottage which turned out to be a tiny bug-infested trailer overlooking a sewage drain. That explains why Uncle Buford had some rental money left over for lottery tickets.
I was a good sport for the first several hours of sand-filled diapers, gritty bologna sandwiches, pinches on the cheek, and requests to hear my off-key rendition of twinkle, twinkle little star. I held it together when Raynelle walked out in her new swimsuit (I've had band aids bigger) and Granny Jean told her she was going to hell. Granny is convinced that half of us are going to hell and the half who aren't should be. I kept my cool when I had to sit with Uncle Buford who on a good day thinks the year is 1956 and he's a runner for the mob. And I did not let my temper slip when Aunt Edna started slurring her words and crying over her cat Bootsy who died when she was twelve.
But I'm only two for gosh sakes, I have my limits. And by the time the sun set on our rusty trailer, my patience had worn thin. It was time for some pay back. I chose bedtime as the perfect opportunity. Bedtimes are always a good opportunity. I must admit that I have mastered the art of bedtime stall tactics. So after six books, two kisses, four glasses of water, and a bedtime prayer that would have made Moses proud, I had my Mommy just where I wanted her, with her eyes glazed over and her mouth gone slack. It was time to bump things up a notch. I picked that moment to call out for my Yucky-Yucky who I knew full well had been left behind at our house sleeping soundly in the guest room commode where I left it.
I know it's an odd name for my most beloved object of affection. But Yucky-Yucky is not your average childhood treasure. Not one of those cute plush animals delivered to me at birth by a line of blue-haired well-wishers from the local Baptist church, but an old plastic naked doll with chopped up hair, a face covered with red magic marker, and a missing pinky - delivered straight out of the mouth of the dog next door - and not too willingly might I add. "NO, NO!" Mommy kept shrieking. "That's the dog's toy. It's yucky, baby. It's yucky, yucky." Hence the name.
I made it clear that I wanted Yucky-Yucky and that I would do anything including holding my breath to get it. It was at that particular moment that all eyes turned on me and pandemonium ensued as the entire cast of wacky southern characters descended on me like the seagulls on the Cheetos we had tossed out on the beach.
I screamed. I kicked. I held my breath until I turned blue and Granny said I was going to hell for being disobedient and Aunt Edna tried to give me mouth to mouth until Mommy stopped her and spared me my first taste of Budweiser.
They sent Uncle Skeeter out to buy another doll, cut off the hair, mark all over the face, run over it a couple of times, and pass it off as my Yucky-Yucky. Please, did they think me an idiot? I may forget the number six every time I count to ten, but I know an imposter when I see one. I let them have a couple moments of peace before launching into another jag of earth-shattering bellows.
It was then that Grunt, Cousin Ned's three-legged deaf hound dog, caught sight of Yucky-Yucky and went after it - one of those nice unplanned surprises. I cranked it up a notch while they all chased after Grunt to get the doll, knocking over furniture and trashing what was probably already considered trash to begin with. Ned finally pried the plastic doll from Grunt's teeth and threw it to Aunt Vyrnetta who managed to grab it and fling it up into the air before falling backwards into the fish tank and ripping her new orange Capri pants which, Mommy was correct, made her rear end look like an overgrown pumpkin.
And this is how the counterfeit Yucky-Yucky flew directly into the ceiling fan which had been operating at full speed ever since Aunt Edna had another one of her hot flashes. And there we all witnessed with startling clarity, the death of this imposter Yucky-Yucky who was decapitated in front of our very eyes. Death by ceiling fan.
I stopped crying. The dog stopped barking. Everybody stopped talking and moving at once. Complete silence except for the sound of the plastic head rolling across the hardwood floor where it landed with a thud against a ceramic dolphin wearing sunglasses, the rest of its body still lodged in the fan, whirling round and round like some freaky carnival ride.
They all agreed that letting me stay up as late as I wanted would have a far lesser impact than the scarring that would occur from the gruesome scene which had just played out. And so there I sat, in the middle of it all, for the rest of the night, nestled in my Aunt Edna's bosom that smelled like roses and Marlboros, while Granny prayed over my soul and Uncle Skeet picked a little "I'll Fly Away" on the guitar. Eventually, I fell asleep. Who can blame me? I was exhausted. And in my dreams I replayed that scene over and over - my first real decapitation. Too cool. How will I ever top that?
We were at the beach, judging by the smell of battered fish and overabundance of joggers wearing thongs. It was another family reunion with Mommy's family who, according to Daddy, doesn't have a brain cell or a complete set of teeth between them - crammed into what was advertised as a quaint water-front cottage which turned out to be a tiny bug-infested trailer overlooking a sewage drain. That explains why Uncle Buford had some rental money left over for lottery tickets.
I was a good sport for the first several hours of sand-filled diapers, gritty bologna sandwiches, pinches on the cheek, and requests to hear my off-key rendition of twinkle, twinkle little star. I held it together when Raynelle walked out in her new swimsuit (I've had band aids bigger) and Granny Jean told her she was going to hell. Granny is convinced that half of us are going to hell and the half who aren't should be. I kept my cool when I had to sit with Uncle Buford who on a good day thinks the year is 1956 and he's a runner for the mob. And I did not let my temper slip when Aunt Edna started slurring her words and crying over her cat Bootsy who died when she was twelve.
But I'm only two for gosh sakes, I have my limits. And by the time the sun set on our rusty trailer, my patience had worn thin. It was time for some pay back. I chose bedtime as the perfect opportunity. Bedtimes are always a good opportunity. I must admit that I have mastered the art of bedtime stall tactics. So after six books, two kisses, four glasses of water, and a bedtime prayer that would have made Moses proud, I had my Mommy just where I wanted her, with her eyes glazed over and her mouth gone slack. It was time to bump things up a notch. I picked that moment to call out for my Yucky-Yucky who I knew full well had been left behind at our house sleeping soundly in the guest room commode where I left it.
I know it's an odd name for my most beloved object of affection. But Yucky-Yucky is not your average childhood treasure. Not one of those cute plush animals delivered to me at birth by a line of blue-haired well-wishers from the local Baptist church, but an old plastic naked doll with chopped up hair, a face covered with red magic marker, and a missing pinky - delivered straight out of the mouth of the dog next door - and not too willingly might I add. "NO, NO!" Mommy kept shrieking. "That's the dog's toy. It's yucky, baby. It's yucky, yucky." Hence the name.
I made it clear that I wanted Yucky-Yucky and that I would do anything including holding my breath to get it. It was at that particular moment that all eyes turned on me and pandemonium ensued as the entire cast of wacky southern characters descended on me like the seagulls on the Cheetos we had tossed out on the beach.
I screamed. I kicked. I held my breath until I turned blue and Granny said I was going to hell for being disobedient and Aunt Edna tried to give me mouth to mouth until Mommy stopped her and spared me my first taste of Budweiser.
They sent Uncle Skeeter out to buy another doll, cut off the hair, mark all over the face, run over it a couple of times, and pass it off as my Yucky-Yucky. Please, did they think me an idiot? I may forget the number six every time I count to ten, but I know an imposter when I see one. I let them have a couple moments of peace before launching into another jag of earth-shattering bellows.
It was then that Grunt, Cousin Ned's three-legged deaf hound dog, caught sight of Yucky-Yucky and went after it - one of those nice unplanned surprises. I cranked it up a notch while they all chased after Grunt to get the doll, knocking over furniture and trashing what was probably already considered trash to begin with. Ned finally pried the plastic doll from Grunt's teeth and threw it to Aunt Vyrnetta who managed to grab it and fling it up into the air before falling backwards into the fish tank and ripping her new orange Capri pants which, Mommy was correct, made her rear end look like an overgrown pumpkin.
And this is how the counterfeit Yucky-Yucky flew directly into the ceiling fan which had been operating at full speed ever since Aunt Edna had another one of her hot flashes. And there we all witnessed with startling clarity, the death of this imposter Yucky-Yucky who was decapitated in front of our very eyes. Death by ceiling fan.
I stopped crying. The dog stopped barking. Everybody stopped talking and moving at once. Complete silence except for the sound of the plastic head rolling across the hardwood floor where it landed with a thud against a ceramic dolphin wearing sunglasses, the rest of its body still lodged in the fan, whirling round and round like some freaky carnival ride.
They all agreed that letting me stay up as late as I wanted would have a far lesser impact than the scarring that would occur from the gruesome scene which had just played out. And so there I sat, in the middle of it all, for the rest of the night, nestled in my Aunt Edna's bosom that smelled like roses and Marlboros, while Granny prayed over my soul and Uncle Skeet picked a little "I'll Fly Away" on the guitar. Eventually, I fell asleep. Who can blame me? I was exhausted. And in my dreams I replayed that scene over and over - my first real decapitation. Too cool. How will I ever top that?
Kamis, 15 Juni 2017
Teaching Your Toddler: 5 Building Blocks for Your Future Reader
Teaching your toddler to become a good reader is simply a matter of building the right foundation!
It's true that no building will stand without the proper foundation being laid, and as a mommy you are a master builder! Your child's education begins at home with you, and it starts the moment life begins! You teach your child everything from finding food to sitting, to crawling, walking, talking, and - YES - even reading! Don't write-off the idea so soon; instead, grab a pen and paper and add these tools to your collection. Soon you'll be constructing a love for learning!
5 Building Blocks for Your Future Reader
BLOCK #1: Make Reading a Daily Routine
Making reading a part of your daily routine is going to help your little one acquire the information and skills needed to succeed in school and life. Yes - it's that powerful! Reading aloud to your child will expose them to the world in which they live, and help them to understand it. It will create awareness of the relationship between sound and print, and increase their vocabulary. It will also engage their imagination, and develop in them a love for learning.
Consistency is key! Reading daily is much simpler than you might think, and you can make it an experience that is fun and special for you toddler. Establish regular times to read, like before bed, and look for other opportunities throughout the day:
Get cozy with a good book in the morning before the day starts.
Read before a nap to help settle your little one down.
Read during snack time.
Read anytime your child brings you a book.
BLOCK #2: Read Age-Appropriate Books
Age is a big factor in selecting the right type of book that will create an enjoyable experience for both you and your child. Today you can find many good books available that will suit your baby's stage of development. For babies and toddlers you'll want to look for:
Books that are easy to manipulate for little hands
Books that are durable (e.g. plastic books or board books)
Age-appropriate subjects (think animals, numbers, family, alphabet, etc.)
Simple, uncluttered illustrations or photos
In addition to selecting age-appropriate books, use YOUR child's interests and imagination to drive your reading selections. They will enjoy looking at books about things that they are curious about in their world!
BLOCK #3: Read with Expression
The value of reading right cannot be emphasized enough! The more excited and animated you are when reading to your child, the more excited they will be to listen. Are there multiple characters in the book? Give them different voices. Are you asking a question or making a statement? Change your tone to match the sentence. Are there certain emotions being expressed? Express that emotion in your voice (sadness, happiness, anger, surprise, excitement) to help bring the story to life.
Why is this important? Reading with expression will help your child to relate the book you are reading to what they are experiencing in their every day life. It will also help early readers with comprehension as meaning is added to the printed word.
If you are not the "animated type," don't worry. You can think outside the box:
Ask an older sibling to read to your little one.
Enlist the help of your spouse or other relatives.
Consider audio books for children.
Practice reading the story with expression before you read it to your child.
BLOCK #4: Make it a "Hands-On" Experience
It's no surprise that a toddler is "hands-on." Rather than fighting against that natural curiosity, guide it in the right direction! Allow your child to turn the pages of the book, to hold it and explore it before you might even read the text. If there are parts of the pages that are fuzzy, or soft, or provide some sort of tactile experience, take your toddlers hand and guide it to "feel" the book.
My 18 month old loves to read The Very Hungry Caterpillar by Eric Carle. One of the main reasons he loves this book is because we stick his little fingers in the holes where the caterpillar "ate through" his food. His favorite day in the book is Saturday, where he gets to touch the chocolate cake, the ice cream cone, the lollipop - you get my point. His hands get to explore the book and it makes it more enjoyable for him!
Another way to create a tactile experience is to use touch throughout the reading. For example, hold your child tight if it's scary, tickle his sides if something silly happened, crawl your fingers on the side of her arm if there is a moment of suspense! Your toddler will love this and it will make your reading time special.
Block #5: Be Patient!
Your patience is included as a key to future reading success because it will be required on the journey! Initially you may feel that your child shows no interest in reading at all and you may be tempted to get discouraged - BE PATIENT. Every child develops at a different pace so don't compare your experience to someone else's. Be consistent and adaptable.
Your little one may bring you his or her favorite book to read over, and over, and over, and over again - BE PATIENT! Reading the same story frequently is exciting to your little one. Before you turn the page they "know what's coming," and may even learn some of the words through the repetition.
When your child really gets into the "nuts and bolts" of reading in school, there may be times of frustration - BE PATIENT! All of your efforts are well worth it!
Now go, master builder, and use these building blocks to lay a solid foundation for your future reader! You CAN teach your toddler!
It's true that no building will stand without the proper foundation being laid, and as a mommy you are a master builder! Your child's education begins at home with you, and it starts the moment life begins! You teach your child everything from finding food to sitting, to crawling, walking, talking, and - YES - even reading! Don't write-off the idea so soon; instead, grab a pen and paper and add these tools to your collection. Soon you'll be constructing a love for learning!
5 Building Blocks for Your Future Reader
BLOCK #1: Make Reading a Daily Routine
Making reading a part of your daily routine is going to help your little one acquire the information and skills needed to succeed in school and life. Yes - it's that powerful! Reading aloud to your child will expose them to the world in which they live, and help them to understand it. It will create awareness of the relationship between sound and print, and increase their vocabulary. It will also engage their imagination, and develop in them a love for learning.
Consistency is key! Reading daily is much simpler than you might think, and you can make it an experience that is fun and special for you toddler. Establish regular times to read, like before bed, and look for other opportunities throughout the day:
Get cozy with a good book in the morning before the day starts.
Read before a nap to help settle your little one down.
Read during snack time.
Read anytime your child brings you a book.
BLOCK #2: Read Age-Appropriate Books
Age is a big factor in selecting the right type of book that will create an enjoyable experience for both you and your child. Today you can find many good books available that will suit your baby's stage of development. For babies and toddlers you'll want to look for:
Books that are easy to manipulate for little hands
Books that are durable (e.g. plastic books or board books)
Age-appropriate subjects (think animals, numbers, family, alphabet, etc.)
Simple, uncluttered illustrations or photos
In addition to selecting age-appropriate books, use YOUR child's interests and imagination to drive your reading selections. They will enjoy looking at books about things that they are curious about in their world!
BLOCK #3: Read with Expression
The value of reading right cannot be emphasized enough! The more excited and animated you are when reading to your child, the more excited they will be to listen. Are there multiple characters in the book? Give them different voices. Are you asking a question or making a statement? Change your tone to match the sentence. Are there certain emotions being expressed? Express that emotion in your voice (sadness, happiness, anger, surprise, excitement) to help bring the story to life.
Why is this important? Reading with expression will help your child to relate the book you are reading to what they are experiencing in their every day life. It will also help early readers with comprehension as meaning is added to the printed word.
If you are not the "animated type," don't worry. You can think outside the box:
Ask an older sibling to read to your little one.
Enlist the help of your spouse or other relatives.
Consider audio books for children.
Practice reading the story with expression before you read it to your child.
BLOCK #4: Make it a "Hands-On" Experience
It's no surprise that a toddler is "hands-on." Rather than fighting against that natural curiosity, guide it in the right direction! Allow your child to turn the pages of the book, to hold it and explore it before you might even read the text. If there are parts of the pages that are fuzzy, or soft, or provide some sort of tactile experience, take your toddlers hand and guide it to "feel" the book.
My 18 month old loves to read The Very Hungry Caterpillar by Eric Carle. One of the main reasons he loves this book is because we stick his little fingers in the holes where the caterpillar "ate through" his food. His favorite day in the book is Saturday, where he gets to touch the chocolate cake, the ice cream cone, the lollipop - you get my point. His hands get to explore the book and it makes it more enjoyable for him!
Another way to create a tactile experience is to use touch throughout the reading. For example, hold your child tight if it's scary, tickle his sides if something silly happened, crawl your fingers on the side of her arm if there is a moment of suspense! Your toddler will love this and it will make your reading time special.
Block #5: Be Patient!
Your patience is included as a key to future reading success because it will be required on the journey! Initially you may feel that your child shows no interest in reading at all and you may be tempted to get discouraged - BE PATIENT. Every child develops at a different pace so don't compare your experience to someone else's. Be consistent and adaptable.
Your little one may bring you his or her favorite book to read over, and over, and over, and over again - BE PATIENT! Reading the same story frequently is exciting to your little one. Before you turn the page they "know what's coming," and may even learn some of the words through the repetition.
When your child really gets into the "nuts and bolts" of reading in school, there may be times of frustration - BE PATIENT! All of your efforts are well worth it!
Now go, master builder, and use these building blocks to lay a solid foundation for your future reader! You CAN teach your toddler!
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